I'm-a-charging my laser

Temptation...

2012-01-06T12:33:00.000-08:00

Normally I don't bother with special edition DVDs or games. The standard is more often than not good enough and fit for purpose, the purpose being to entertain of course.

However, when I bought Deus Ex last year I was pleasantly surprised by the small but nice artbook, tucked in next to the game disc in a stylish matt black case. Since then, I'm a bit more open to games with extras.

With Mass Effect 3 only months away from release, I'm tempted by what the collectors edition has to offer. Very expensive it is, but look at that 70 page hardcover artbook...

Journey of the Dovahkiin: using a dead man's house

2012-01-02T02:26:00.000-08:00

Here's something strange. A dragon appeared. Well, that's not especially unusual in this game, except that it seems to happen a bit more often than I expected. Here's something stranger. Two of my encounters with the scaly beasts have been in Rorikstead, this little village of 4 houses huddled together.

Life is never dull for the people of Rorikstead, who with each incident are fewer than ever. The place is a magnet for excitement. First of all, a group of bandits runs after me into the village, determiend to give me hugs. No, wait that's not right. Intent on murdering me. I come back to this little vilage a few nights later and bump into a bunch of hired thugs, recruited to take care of me. They barely have time to die when a dragon comes crashing down on the place. Hold on, could I be the magnet and these poor souls paying for it?

Well, some good did come out of all this. In the ensuing chaos, the humble farmer Lemkil perished. He bequethed his homely cottage to me. No, wait, he didn't. I just nabbed his key off his fresh corpse, and now use his home to store all my stuff. And boy do I have a lot of stuff. It's like a teenager's bedroom.

Oh dear, things then got a bit awkward. I step in one day and staring straight at me is Lemkil's young daughter. "Who're you? What're you doing in our house?" If you don't leave I'm calling the village guards!" It's almost like she doesn't know her father won't be coming home...

Journey of the Dovahkiin: run like a pussy

2011-12-30T11:54:00.000-08:00

My hardest fight so far took place while exploring this dungeon. When I say fight I meant "run away as fast as possible" since I came face to face with a Master Vampire, a foe which I'm sure I shouldn't be facing yet. From past experience playing other sandbox RPGs, the occasional unassailable enemy is to be expected.

It was at a certain point before I realised Mr undead was way out of my league, that point being when my health was getting worringly low. So I ran like a pussy, trying to set off fire traps behind me. I looked back and Mr undead was still on my heels, pale and muderous as ever. Why did I even think that would work? I had drained all my magicka throwing firebolts at him already. Stamina low and slowing down, I dropped off the nearest edge and prayed. Ah, but the gods abandoned me when I needed them most.

Like a deadlier version of Groundhog Day, I had saved my game at a bad point, slap bang just before Mr undead. So, a change to my tactic. This time it would be "run away as fast as possible and slam the doors behind me", a tactic which worked really well.

Journey of the Dovahkiin: my first foray into Skyrim

2011-12-28T11:54:00.000-08:00

It's settled. Skyrim ranks as one of the most open RPGs to ever grace my hard drive.

My first step was to spend about 2 hours creating my character. I went for an Imperial and came up with a tanned dude with long black hair. He looked vaguely Edward James Olmos on the creation screen but somehow ends up like Kirk Douglas and Native American.

After making my way through some dank caves in the game's compulsory escape scene - following the not so brilliant lead of Hadvar into a cavern of spiders on the way - I made it out into the refreshing cold, northern air of Skyrim.

Air! Freezing cold air! Oh, the joy!

To test out how much of a sandbox this game can be, instead of heading for Riverwood like Hadvar suggested I wandered. Not sure where, but those woods look interesting. Any sane person would head for civilisation.

Before long and I was in trouble. I stumbled across a cosy looking campfire, complete with tents and rabbit meat roasting over flames. Like a less innocent version of the Goldilocks tale, I was greeted with arrows and a lot of shouting. I failed to make out the words, but it was probably something along the lines of "it's not your lucky day stranger" or "stay away from my teacosy".

The predictable end to bringing a bare chest to a sword fight

This would have been difficult for me if I had scrambled out of that cave with nothing but the shirt on my back. However this is an RPG, the perfect stomping ground for explorers/treasure hunters/kleptomaniacs and I already had a sword and shield in hand, plus the Roman-esque armour I would soon swap with those bandits.

Before long and I was in a bandit hideout. The Pinewood bandits, as they're known, live out in this seemingly innocent little cottage that actually hides this big underground cave. It was obvious they had a loving relationship with their leader, since he fixed notes with daggers to every door telling everyone to stay the hell away from his treasure. Damn, I'm glad my work life isn't like this.

I was struck by the sight of a table full of food. Cheese wheels! Salmon steaks! Was this the treasure he was on about? Err, not exactly. Besides, should I be this excited over game food?

I had my doubts about this game, but now...

No, turns out the treasure was the less edible but still lovely gold. Loads of it.

Not another RPG with complex character creation!

2011-12-26T10:58:00.000-08:00

I thought I had put that life behind me. 2 hours spent just creating Shepard for Mass Effect, almost as long in Fallout 3. Now Christmas hits me with Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. Oh, and Rage (thanks family!).

I've been looking forward to this. Another incredibly meaty RPG to bury myself in, just as soon as I get time. For now, here's some inhabitants of Skyrim fighting over a cabbage. In French.

The problem of British pharmacy Part I

2011-12-15T11:46:00.000-08:00

Something strange has happened to the life of the pharmacist. It constantly prodded away at my squidgy brain and only as a qualified pharmacist did I fully realise it.

Pharmacy in the UK is a product of Thatcher's Britain but, oddly, also shares something in common with a planned economy. More than you'd think.

The daily life of a pharmacist working for - insert name of multiple - has become increasingly one of churning out prescriptions and meeting targets. While the starting salary is quite attractive and more than enough to feed a strapping young guy like myself, the pressure to achieve targets has led to a different kind of stress. This is compounded by employers inserting non-pharmacists into management roles to oversee the running of day to day business. Some time ago, I had the pleasure of listening to a story about a pharmacist who was berated in front of the public by such an individual. Her crime? Refusal to supply a controlled drug without a prescription. More on this later.

What has this to do with Thatcherism? Consider this. In the 1980s, a trend emerged (and one that is worryingly still affecting many industries, businesses and professions in the UK) during the era of the Thatcher government where it was believed everything could be made better and more efficient by setting targets. The absurdity of striving for targets meant that things you wouldn't really measure before e.g. hospital waiting times, how long it takes to perform a task; were being scrutinized. Perhaps this is an unfortunate side effect of a state owned healthcare system that needs to make the most of what's available. The practice of enforcing target after target is endemic to community pharmacy (the largest branch of the profession), now dominated by a few large multiples who quibble over how long it takes to prepare a prescription and so on.

While I'm all for a free market and competition, having a few multiples or corporate bodies dominating the pharmacy scene actually has a horrible effect. To make me sound slightly smart, think of a bell curve. One end would represent a country where all the pharmacies are independently owned, at the other end there are no independents (they've all been squeezed out and driven to closure) and everyone in pharmacy wears those hideous white outfits. You know the ones I'm talking about. Just as in a country's economy, there needs to be a healthy mixture of small and large businesses and without this too many pharmacists would be working in an environment that promotes not innovation but ass licking.

On the subject of ass licking, working for a multiple has exposed to me the pleasure of receiving visits from the top brass in our wonderful company. Everyone laughs and smiles, it can only be assumed that this is completely rehearsed and that somewhere the rifle of a sniper is trained on a few heads.

This photo is not rehearsed at all. Being weighed for how fat you are really is that fun.

I still haven't got to why a planned economy resembles British pharmacy. Oh, that final year of secondary school spent studying advanced History is finally paying off. The cool kids like myself will remember the famous Five year plans of the Soviet Union in the 1930s to 1960s, the aim of these being to turn Russia into an industrial superpower.

At their most extreme a 330% expansion in heavy industry was penned. It doesn't take a lot of brains to realise this is a little high. How did those working in the lower rungs satisfy those above them? They increased production, and increased it, and increased it. When the target was to increase the tonnes carried per kilometers onboard trains, trains went long distances just to meet targets. Products like seats were built bigger so that managers could boast that they were using more material. The parallel is that targets set out by the pharmacy multiples increasingly appear to exist for the sake of existing. Anyone who's watched an episode of the Office or read Dilbert will also realise that in the workplace results would also be inflated by employees eager not to get fired.

We will sell 500% more Viagra by the end of the year. What do you mean we can't sell it over the counter?

While he was alive and kicking, Stalin was eager to cull a large chunk of the educated people in the Soviet economy and control them with people whose loyalty was guaranteed. It's a bit like your manager, that non-pharmacist who watches over your shoulder and orders you around. The major difference is that there are no cullings (but that may change with remote supervision), and you don't die. Well, if the managers don't kill you, the stress will.

Next time, I'll draw comparisons with H.G. Wells' the Time Machine and why we're becoming like Eloi and Morlocks.

-Some of the points I've raised may remind people of famed documentary producer Adam Curtis. I've watched many of his documentaries and must say that they're thought provoking and trigger a great deal of discussion. Hence this modest rant of mine, injected with my own brand of humour.

A whole cadre of ninjas and secret police scour the land, plying their unholy trade

2011-12-06T03:44:00.000-08:00

One thing's for sure. The Daimyo of the Shimazu clan will not see heaven.

My current Shogun 2 campaign is going terrifically well, my armies conquering their way across the land. In my first decent playthrough of the game (I got mauled at previous attempts, the AI is much improved in this new Total war), I've learned the value of alliances which can be vital if you want someone to watch your back when Realm Divide hits, where everyone else gangs up to kick your overpowering ass. Okay, the Takeda and Date got thrashed so maybe weren't the best allies, but I had the right idea.

Secondly, I'm making use of agents. A whole cadre of ninjas and secret police scour the land, plying their unholy trade. This is why my Daimyo will not see heaven. In the course of about 30 years, he's ordered countless assassinations and underhanded tasks. I've lost count of how many people I assassinated, and whole towns and armies have been bought over with Shimazu gold. Is it wrong to kill a monk? Two monks? Three? Four? How many more serene, wise and religious men must I kill?

Very powerful, these agents. Perhaps a a bit too powerful.

Random Thoughts: why proselytizing is a bad idea

2011-11-24T02:30:00.000-08:00

So I was watching a re-run of 30 Rock, and one of the characters sang a song, "Oh everybody born before Jesus is in hell."

Funny, ha ha. However before I knew it, my warped mind went into action and started over thinking it. So, next time I'm approached by someone trying to preach Christianity to me (and boy, do I get a lot of those), I should jump into a lively debate with them.

Me: So what you're saying is that I'll go heaven if I adopt Jesus as my saviour?

Religious guy: Absolutely.

Me: So what about my parents? They're Buddhist. So, they'll go to hell?

Religious guy: Errm, well...

Me: What about my grandparents? Or my ancestors?

Religious guy: Well, you see...

Me: Is this why the Romans killed so many Christians, because they were basically saying that all their loved ones were condemned to burn for all eternity?

Religious guy: Ahhh...

Me: Why doesn't Jesus swoop down from the clouds and hadouken everyone?

Movie Review: Moon (SPOILERS AHEAD)

2011-10-29T13:36:00.000-07:00

The opening of Moon. Man goes about his daily grind, exercises on a treadmill, eats meals, watches TV. Doesn't sound that exciting. Then again, it's not supposed to be. The feeling of utter drudgery is what the movie is trying to evoke.

As soon as I watched this, it reminded me somewhat of Alien and 2001: a Space odyssey. The similarity to Alien comes from the depiction of daily life on board a spaceship/space station. Eating ready meals, and not having much to do except your monotonous job. Moon also reminded me of 2001: a Space Odyssey in that both depict people doing a job far from home, having to contend with isolation and loneliness (or limited human company).

Atmosphere aside, what really struck me was how early the plot twist appears. About halfway, in fact. The protagonist, Bell, wakes up on a medical bed following an accident. Everything is fine, except it's not. With a bit of work, he discovers he is not the first crewman on this moon base but the latest of many clones. He finds the previous one (the one we've been watching) and revives him.

There's a reason why this twist happens so early. To explore the significance of this turn of events. The next half allows plenty of time to show the interaction between the two and thus explore Bell as a character. Neither is willing to believe they are the clone and both are convinced they're the real Bell. Things get violent and fights break out. Earlier on there are hints about Bell's life, including a past history of anger issues that led to estrangement from his wife. He is frustrated at past events, his loneliness and isolation. So when Bell is quite literally fighting himself, it's reflection of his own frustration at himself.

This isn't to say that Moon is flawless. This very interaction I spoke about didn't go quite far enough, so the movie falls just a little short. So to me, not a perfect movie, but one that's still pretty damn good.

Opening a pharmacy?

2011-10-23T13:14:00.000-07:00

Only qualified for 3 months and already I'm thinking about my own little slice of pharmacy heaven. Employment with my current employer won't last for many years, but that's not a surprise (all you pharmacists out there, you know what I mean).

However I love working with them for one reason. No, not the money although it does keeps the bank account looking nice.

The reason? Work a year or two as a relief pharmacist and you'll know what makes a good pharmacy. Or, to put it the other way, what makes a rubbish pharmacy.

This will require money. Loads of it. After all, a pharmacy contract doesn't come cheap. A ~~scapegoat~~ business partner will be nice too.

Deus Ex: robots, cyborg ninjas and ancient Chinese secrets

2011-10-09T11:08:00.000-07:00

Belltower dock. I'm supposed to navigate my way through this complex full of massive cargo containers to find a package. Oh, and there are lots of guards. And robots. Yeah, Deus Ex has robots. Not particularly sophisticated (more like guns on wheels) but not the type of foe I can strangle or stab. Then again, not the smartest.

Security bots. Less intelligence than a goldfish.

Again, I'm going about this stealthily. Like a ninja. A ninja with artificial arms, enhanced eyes and legs. So, Jensen's a cyborg ninja. The scenery helps, since running through open ground isn't a healthy thing for a cyborg ninja to be doing. Also, my legs allow me to jump 9 feet in the air. I make the most of this, jumping onto containers to evade guards (human and robot) and onto rooftops to neutralise snipers.

I finally make it into the building where Tong has the package hidden. It's at this point that my radio crackles to life and Tong himself speaks to me. In my husky voice (Jensen's, not mine) I snarl at him.

"How did you get this frequency?"

"Ancient Chinese secret."

In a way my character is over reacting. After all I've been hacking into every computer I find, reading everyone's emails and stuff. Privacy is trampled over in Deus Ex. Personally I found Tong's answer pretty hilarious.

Deus Ex: fire extinguishers and vending machines can be your friends

2011-09-28T10:55:00.000-07:00

"You gotta help me Jensen! They're gonna kill me!"

As Arie van Bruggen looks on desperately, I ponder the situation. Belltower security are searching Alice Gardens, a cheap and dirty apartment block, intent on killing van Bruggen. Give him my combat rifle or pistol to defend himself, or leave him to die? Silenced pistol, I might add, upgraded with armour piercing ammo.

I tell the hacker he's on his own and he throws an F-bomb at me before climbing back into his bunk to sit nervously. So that's his plan B. My plan, in contrast, is to get out of Alice Gardens and not die.

Hug!

I'm doing my best in this game to not kill people directly. Apart from added XP points, this playing style is generally more fun. So no to shooting things until they die, and yes to stealth and innovative solutions.

Ho ho, please...no more jokes...my sides are hurting...

This is where Deus Ex shines as an RPG. I could very well just make the whole thing a loud and violent massacre, but I have the option to play it otherwise.

Speaking of options, I find myself in a tricky spot. I've stealthily made my way into a dead end. There are half a dozen enemies nearby, so far still unaware of my presence. There's no way I can sneak past so many of them, so I look around. I eye up the fire extinguisher and chuck that out into the courtyard, the noise alerting two guys. One of them is carrying a heavy rifle, packing some serious firepower. Okay, if I do this wrong I'm dead. As they come into the corridor, I lob a concussion grenade and blind them for a moment. It's all the time I need to stab both of them. It wouldn't have worked if not for the flash suppressant augmentation protecting me from the blinding effect of my own grenade.

An augmentation which, like all augmentations, is optional. It's perfectly possible to finish the game without any. This would no doubt be incredibly challenging and besides augmentations can be incredibly fun to use.

The wedgie augmentation is the best

There's one for every situation, like the concussion grenade scenario. My choice of aug depends on my play style. Being the stealthy and deep thinking guy I am I've gone for those that let me be a better computer hacker, jump higher and lift heavier loads. That last one is perfect for reaching hidden places. And throwing vending machines at people. I never said I was above brute force.

It's just a perfect example of how open the game can be and the many paths you can take. The only thing missing is the option to disguise yourself in another person's clothing, but that would probably break the game. And turn me into the murderous clothes thief I became in Fallout 3.

Deus Ex: I was wracked with doubt about killing a man. For about 3 minutes.

2011-09-25T16:57:00.000-07:00

The mission? Infiltrate Tai Yong Medical. So how did I end up doing the shady job of throwing a gangster off a roof?

Well, here I am. Outside Diamond Chan's apartment, in the Youzhao district of Hengsha. A quick hack and I'm inside. Doing the usual i.e. sifting through the wardrobe and cupboards; I also come across his emails (nothing is sacred in Deus Ex).

More precisely, emails from his mother.

"With boundless love. Your mother."

He doesn't seem like such a bad person. This is giving me second thoguhts. I don't often have these kind of doubts. Wracked with uncertainty I take a stepo outside onto the rooftop.

Then I realise I'm at the wrong address. Chan's home is next door. The loving messages I've been reading belonged to another man.

Oh well, time to bash Chan's head in.

No more stories of hot asian Shepard for now

2011-09-02T13:29:00.000-07:00

Anyone who bothers to read my blog will notice I like to write about the games I play. A lot. I blogged about Fallout, S.TA.L.K.E.R., Mass Effect and more.

Mass Effect 2 was an improvement of the first in almost every way and an absolute joy to play. Everyone had their own story to tell. I'm no exception, but I've lost all my screenshots. Without them, my blogging would be as exciting as trying to tell a ghost story with crudely drawn cardboard cut outs.

So for now, there'll be no more stories of hot asian Shepard. Here's some good news though, Jack dies in my game. She was painful to listen to and irritated the hell out of me. I think we can all agree on that.

In the name of gaming

2011-08-19T04:52:00.000-07:00

As a pat on the back for becoming a pharmacist, and because I felt like it, I've gone ahead and ordered a new desktop PC. Previously I dwelt on building my very own gaming rig, but in an ironic twist my higher salary now also comes with less free time. So not much time to build one completely from scratch and err, probably not much time for games but I still want a gaming rig!

Therefore I went the middle way and invested in a build from pcspecialist.co.uk. Behold:

Intel Core i5-2500k 4.6GHz (over clocked)

ASUS P8P67 motherboard

4GB DDR3 2133MHz RAM

Radeon HD 6950 graphics card

Corsair 650W PSU

Coolit ECO II C240 ALC cooler

Coolermaster CM690 Mk II case

Resisting the temptation to just pick the most impressive and expensive parts, and because my long term plan is to update this PC every once in a while (crack that baby open!), I did a little research first.

The graphics card has a glowing review from Techradar. No longer top of the line for Radeon but still incredible and with new cards coming out all the time, I plan on updating anyway. That means a hefty power supply, so throw in the Corsair. Plus, the overclocked CPU's going to get toasty too so the ECO II C240 will provide adequate cooling. Like the graphics card, the CPU's not top of the line but still very good. The price of overclocking is shorter life, and that highly versatile motherboard should allow room for updating.

Finally, a decent looking case. Few people give this much thought, but for me I wanted something that looks nice and not like a sci fi prop, would actually help the computer run well i.e. good ventilation; and because I'm thinking long term, a case that can accommodate new components in the future.

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to start browsing amazon. That's right, I'm looking at you Shogun 2. Deus Ex. Space Marine. Civilisation 5...

Fallout 3: how I became a murderous addict.

2011-08-17T11:37:00.000-07:00

Those Fallout 3 rants of mine ended quite abruptly. As a game that occupied a good part of my time and kick started all this blogging I do about my PC games, I think a final entry is in order.

My character became a drug addicted, unkempt, alcoholic after taking too many chems, grabbed an axe from an inbred hillbilly, stole the clothes off Tobar the ferryman, and went on a rampage. In my defense he stole a slice of my brain. And tried to shoot me. Shooting a guy in power armour was not a good idea.

This was kind of ironic since in real life I hate drug abuse and shot everyone who did drugs. In the game.

Anyhow, my character became an axe wielding maniac and murdered all the good folk of Megaton. Those unused landmines, grenades and missiles also went to good use. To create the best gods damn fireworks show ever.

Jason Momoa as Conan? This could be good.

2011-08-16T05:04:00.000-07:00

A new Conan movie? Interesting. Jason Momoa (Stargate Atlantis, Game of Thrones) as Conan? This just makes me want to see it more.

Judging from the trailer, it looks like this Conan will have more dialogue and actually say stuff. You know, more like a person and less like Schwarzenegger.

Since watching the 1982 movie I've been reading Dark Horse comics' series and if 2011's Conan has any of the depth and complexity of the comic character, then this movie may be good.

Conan, what is best in life? To be able to watch a good Conan movie with Jason Momoa, that's what it would be.

Random Thoughts: the Time Machine

2011-08-07T14:36:00.000-07:00

Another night spent indoors watching movies. Tonight it's the Time Machine. I'm referring to the 1960 version of course and, like anyone with too much free time and few precious social skills, I spotted some odd things in that movie. No, not the fact that the Eloi all look like ABBA. Other things, like...

1) World War III takes place 6 years into the audience's future: this little thing isn't actually such a big deal, but still worth pointing out. Movies where disasters happen have always been set in the not so distant future.

Plus, let's not forget that the Cold War was very much alive and well at the time. Incidentally, this was only 2 years before the Cuban missile crisis.

2) The trains are still running: it's nice to know that even with the incoming nukes being only minutes away, there are still diligent people making sure the trains run on time.

3) Morlocks are extremely flammable: obviously the Morlocks evolved to be flammable and explosive. Or, they've been bathing in liquid paraffin.

AIIIIEEEEE!

4) Can the Time machine land on top of someone? When he's back in 1900 the Time traveler drags his machine to another spot, intending to return to the future outside the Sphinx and where Weena will be.

How the hell does he know he won't land right on top of the Eloi?

People have speculated that it's possible the Time traveler might end up appearing inside a mountain or under the ocean. He might even materialise and finds himself merged into a tree or person who just happened to be on the same spot.

It's only by sheer luck that nothing like this ever happens in his 800,000 year or so journey through time.

5) An undiscovered flower? That proves nothing: aghast that no one believes his adventure took place, the Time traveler brings out his flower from the future, exclaiming "try and match that to any species known today."

That really doesn't prove anything. The Time Machine takes place 64 years after Darwin's voyage around the world when Europeans were discovering hundreds of new species of flora and fauna. Even now, we're still in the process of doing so.

6) Mrs Watchett must think Filby is insane: after the Time traveler leaves for the last time, Filby comments on this and what books he took with him. Meanwhile Mrs Warchett is standing about listening to him talk about time travel and stuff, not quite sure what the hell the Scotsman is on about.

Oh Mr Filby, have you had one too many whiskeys again?

Either overhaul the welfare state or bring back workhouses

2011-08-06T07:05:00.000-07:00

It just occurred to me, I really don't like the welfare state and the idea of cradle to the grave.

Perhaps it's my Chinese upbringing, but I was brought up with a strong sense of work ethic. This was hit home to me while I was at work today, trying to check prescriptions when a couple and their child in pram arrived requesting something on the minor ailments scheme.

Time for some exposition. The minor ailments scheme allows people in Scotland exempt from prescription charges e.g. children; to receive certain non prescription medicines free of charge, at the pharmacist's discretion.

Sounds great, huh? Not really, it gets abused so much by the public. The father of the child stood and stared at me constantly, as if suggesting that his time was precious and I should hurry up.

That's the problem with a welfare state. It imparts a sense of entitlement to people, that they are entitled to things for free and don't have to work like everyone else if they don't want to, meanwhile forgetting that what they receive comes from taxpayer's money.

It damages the work ethic and stifles competitiveness. There's nothing like fear of not having a roof over your head to make people work harder.

So, either make the welfare screening process more rigorous or bring back the work house.

Oh, I need to stop buying stuff I don't need...

2011-08-01T11:41:00.000-07:00

Again I've forked out cash for more stuff I don't really need. This time it's a Farnsworth replica from the TV show Warehouse 13.

Well, actually the cash is for a pre-order waiting list since the first batch went like hot cakes while I was at work (damn you, professional commitments!).

So, no guarantee that I'll get one. Well, I can always spend that £290 on something sensible.

The only pharmacist in today and a queue of addicts

2011-07-30T12:54:00.000-07:00

Oh dear, only recently qualified for less than a week and I'm stuck in a pharmacy and expected to supervise 20 methadone patients.

What's methadone and supervision, you ask? In layman's terms, the state pays to keep drug addicts on controlled daily doses of opioid i.e. methadone; and it's up to the pharmacist to hand it out everyday. Make a mistake and give out the wrong dose to the wrong person, and goodbye license to practice and hello prison.

So, newly qualified, with only one dispenser around and a queue of addicts. The pressure is on. What do I do? Check my work over and over again!

There has got to be a rule against doing this to newly qualified pharmacists.

Curse you corporate pharmacy.

Helensburgh is so relaxing, I might live there

2011-07-27T13:32:00.000-07:00

Okay, I've only worked as a relief pharmacist for one day in Helensburgh and I'm already considering what life would be like if I settled down. Such a wonderful seaside town, with a slow pace of life and none of the pressure a pharmacist would experience elsewhere. This could be the life for me.

Look out world, there's a new pharmacist here!

2011-07-23T13:37:00.000-07:00

"Whether a candidate has been successful or not can be determined without opening the results letter: a small thin letter indicates a pass, whereas a thick one does not." - Chi-Loon Cheung

That's actually quite a horrible prospect. Simply looking at your envelope, you'll know whether or not you've become a pharmacist.

The big thump on the floor as the letters and parcels slid through the mail box was enough to make my heart skip a beat. It made me wonder if the thump was that thick envelope no one wants to see.

The thump was my DVD boxed set from amazon.

The envelope was a thin one, I'm pleased to say.

It's settled. I'm going as Lando Calrissian this Halloween.

2011-07-11T01:26:00.000-07:00

The Lando Calrissian Disguise kit. Hands down, this has got to be the best costume. Ever. They're shipping them out in crate loads, so it must be good. Or incredibly cheap to make.

Mass Effect: Shepard's mind gets swiss cheesed, strangulation follows shortly after.

2011-07-08T14:09:00.000-07:00

Ashley's in black now. Much better.

Shepard and track Saren to one of his secret bases and prepare to infiltrate and destroy it. It'll be a mission full of bravery and sacrifice. Not everyone will make it back alive. The stuff of legends.

The team fight their way in and come across a Prothean beacon. Like last time, it proceeds to swiss cheese Shepard's brain.

NOT AGAIN!

Not letting such a trivial thing get in the way, Shepard and team set the timer up on the nuke. A firefight breaks out as the outnumbered men and women of the Normandy try to hold off the Geth.

Damn it Ashley, why are you wearing that again?

So far, no sign of Saren. A big complex filled with loads of expendable Geth troops and secret labs filled with prisoners. He's almost turning out like some corny movie villain with monocle and black moustache. Then he shows up and he's a badass.

Who proceeded to strangle Shepard within an inch of her life.

Random Thoughts: Wrath of Khan

2011-07-06T09:52:00.000-07:00

Wow, Ceti Alpha V is some planet. An inhospitable desert of a world, those brain slug things, a shortage of soap. It's so bad even your hair and skin colour will change:

As was realised by an unsuspecting group of augments, who woke up to find themselves turned into ABBA. Only Ricardo Montalban, with his Latin American awesomeness, managed to resist this fate.

Mass Effect: Wrex is not a happy battletoad

2011-07-04T08:21:00.000-07:00

So we've tracked Saren to a secret base where he's brainwashing people and growing an army of Krogan. Apparently he's found a cure to the genophage that's slowly killing the Krogan race. Knowing how quickly Krogan can breed and how tough they are, this would be a perfect weapon. Naturally Wrex is pissed off that the cure will need to be destroyed to prevent it being misused.

Careful dude, I just got this jumpsuit back from the dry cleaner

This is one of those times when I could reload my last save and try to change events. My time machine if you will. Try as I might, Shepard's just not persuasive enough. Sorry Wrex, nothing personal. I'll just have to stick with this outcome. It adds to the immersion. A Shepard who must make tough choices, who will kill if it's necessary and live with her actions.

Mass Effect: a research facility in lockdown mode and a red hologram. Why does this sound familiar?

2011-07-03T15:51:00.000-07:00

Next stop, the ice planet Noveria. Apparently there are reports of Geth operating on the planet, so it's worth checking out (and a way to advance the plot). Right away Shepard and crew receive a warm welcome, and by warm I mean not at all. Captain Maeko Matsuo, head of secuity, and her people are not happy with outside interference and are very trigger happy. Only some timely intervention stops them killing Shepard - no scrap that, stops Shepard killing them. For now.

Hmm, some shady cover up by corporate higher ups, and an isolated research station. This is not a good recipe. Worse of all, that Matsuo tries to take the opportunity to bump Shepard off. Remember how much of a jerk she was being? Well the carpet just became stained with a lovely shade of Matsuo. Sure enough, my bad vibes are confirmed and we find the place crawling with giant bugs. There's a team of soldiers/marines desperately defending the place. Tartakovsky, one of the lead scientists, gets impaled mid sentence.

We get a red hologram too. That's never a good thing. None of these things, so far, make for a happy time.

I'd continue and talk about the showdown with Matriarch Benezia. Let's just say Shepard kicks ass and the matriarch dies, though the latter wasn't necessarily my fault. Honest.

Random Thoughts: X-Men the last stand

2011-07-02T13:12:00.001-07:00

At the end of X-Men: the last stand, Magneto is rendered powerless by one of the most dangerous methods of needle use. With his power of magnetism lost, he sits in a park somewhere, moping about in front of a chessboard.

Wait, what?

One of the greatest threats to mankind is free to go. Shouldn't he be in prison? Sure, he may be powerless but it doesn't absolve him of his crimes. No one thought to keep him in that big plastic prison thing. Just in case his powers do return. Let's not worry too much though, that'll never happen...

I can still do awesome poses!

Mass Effect: the Citadel is a lovely city. Yet, every city has its seedy underbelly.

2011-06-30T10:44:00.000-07:00

Even the Citadel, that great jewel of the galaxy has it's shady side. I happened to wander into that shady side as part of my search for clues after Eden Prime. Now I find myself in a spot involving a blend of gunfighting and ass kicking. I'm becoming an antihero of sorts.

The little "discussion" with the Krogan blackmailer turned sour and I had to resort to more aggressive options.

Morlan the shopkeeper had the wits to duck behind his desk as things turned ugly.

Yeah, you guessed it. Guns were drawn. In the middle of a market place. For someone so big, the Krogan went down easily.

Mass Effect: in every time and every place, the deeds of men remain the same. And redshirts will always die.

2011-06-28T10:17:00.000-07:00

Mass Effect is proving to be be a real time sink. It's caught and held my attention so strongly I'm deciding to do a little blog rant much like I did with Fallout 3. It must be the mixture of RPG/shooter type gameplay, immersive environment and some sweet voice acting that's made me stay up into the late evening hours.

The characters are well written, so you actually want to engage them in dialogue. Even the Normandy's arrogant pilot Joker is worth talking to, even if he does grate on the nerves at times. It's a bit like Wash from Firefly, funny and annoying but in a good way. Most of the time.

"I prefer gold to silver. You know, for my medal. I figured you'd recommend me for one since I pulled, uh, your boots out of the fire." Is there an option to punch him?

What about Shepard, the main character? Well, Shepard is what you make him. Or her. Yeah, my Shepard is female and voiced by Jennifer Hale, who really makes the character come to life. It's one the reasons I switch my laptop on these days. Male Shepard, I was told, sounds stiff and cardboard like. This is one of those games where you decide what kind of person the protagonist will be. Will my Shepard be one to uphold truth and justice, an asshole or something in between? We'll see.

So the maiden voyage of the Normandy takes us to Eden Prime, a frontier human colony. It sounds like a lovely place.

It was.

Shepard and team arrive to find the place trashed and overrun with the robotic Geth. Oh, and Jenkins goes the way of the redshirt. Who is Jenkins you ask? He was a young soldier eager for some action. Then he went the way redshirts do. Do I have to repeat myself? Who will fill the void left by poor Jenkins? Why, Ashley of course.

She's good with a gun. I approve. She wears a pink jumpsuit. I don't approve.

Shepard's brain gets a bit messed up by a piece of ancient alien technology and she receives a plethora of strange visions. It's really quite disturbing and I won't try to describe it using words. Let's just say it's like the type of dream that leaves you in a cold sweat or a pool of your own urine. Maybe both. Oh, and there's a big flash and bang.

Skip forward and the Normandy arrives at the Citadel. The Council is dismissive, refusing to believe in Shepard's jumbled visions and claiming the attack on Eden Prime was nothing more than an isolated incident.

Soon we will have our revenge on the Jedi - My third sci fi reference so far.

They refuse to believe that Saren, their top agent in the Spectres (the Council's special police force) was involved. He'll become pretty important to the story. More to come.

Post exam stress and worry

2011-06-26T15:11:00.000-07:00

It's that similar feeling after every year of Pharmacy school. Like everyone else I mope about the exams I sat, wondering how well I did and thinking about what I think i did wrong etc.

Whatever you want to call it - post exam stress, post exam worry, post exam fallout - it hits everyone. This year, the stakes are that much higher. The registration exam, the big one that determines if I qualify.

So understandably, the moping is even more justified. I can't help trying to recall my answers. Did I do that one right? What was the correct answer to that one? I've even brought out the books to check, in some cases making myself feel worse. Well, no point in thinking about it now. I'll find out come July.

Just a fussy gamer wanting the perfect asian character

2011-06-25T16:11:00.000-07:00

10 minutes to install the game. 2 hours to create a character. The most complicated character creation system in PC gaming? Nope, just a gamer trying to create the perfect asian Shepard.

This has become a thing for me, to create an asian character in the RPGs I play: Fallout 3, Dragon Age and now Mass Effect.

Not always easy.

In Dragon Age, for example, you had a variety of flavours to choose from: black guy, white guy, brown guy, slightly darker brown guy. That's it. The bloke I eventually came up with looked asian...kind of. Oddly, the parents both looked suspiciously white. I like to imagine a backstory involving adoption or adultery, it helps the immersion.

It took a while, and my playing about with the sliders wasn't amounting to what I wanted, then I found the perfect character template online. Amanda Shepard was born.

Oh, I've run out of space, so I'll talk next time about my first time playing Mass Effect and why I chose a female character. (note to self: you don't run out of space on a blog).

Doctor Who and the Terror of the Rehash (SPOILERS AHEAD)

2011-05-08T05:45:00.000-07:00

Actually the title is "The Curse of the Black spot" but it certainly felt like an idea used too often. The opener to this season was great and hopefully this is just a little hiccup.

While Doctor Who has always cleverly presented stories where mythological creatures turn out to be aliens/alien technology, "The Curse of the Black spot" felt too much like "The Empty Child" where the twist in the story that would make us go "oh, I see" seemed too familiar

Get the London look

The setting is a bit cliched. Pirates? Really? I love pirates but it felt too much like the protagonists had landed on the set of a movie.

Yo ho ho and a...oh whatever.

The episode ends with a bunch of 18th century pirates cruising around in a starship from the future. As cool as that may sound, does anyone else see a problem with that?

On the bright side, the next episode is written by Neil Gaiman.

Let's play Abe's Oddyssey

2011-05-06T01:25:00.000-07:00

In 1997, a time when 3D graphics were dominating the world of gaming, a quirky platformer was released. One which proved to be surprisingly fun and incredibly memorable. People either loved or hated Abe's Oddyssey, a game where you had no weapons at your disposal. Just lots of running, rolling and hiding.

Browsing gog.com, I came across this old gem of a title and with my old Playstation long gone, the PC version was the logical choice. £5.99 and a speedy download later, and I was revisiting Oddworld.

Set in a quirky and rather disturbing world, you must escape a meat factory and rescue your people, who are due to end up as the next big product. From its first release, people have already commented on the environmental message and suggested the game was an attack on real world animal farming, so I'll dispense with this and talk about gameplay and atmosphere.

I played this for the first time in 14 years, with the best intentions. To rescue everyone. I rarely live up to such high minded ideals. I tried, I really did. I looked for every secret area, even reloading the game when I saw that stern reminder near the end of the first level.

It means exactly what it says

Everything is out to get you. Guards armed with machine guns, nasty wild animals, landmines, trap doors, falling debris, meat grinders, the list goes on No weapons. Just your own ingenuity and your plucky character's agile body, allowing you to run, hide, tip toe and roll your way to freedom. Not always in that order, mind you. So it's a bit like Metal Gear, but more horrible. Fear not, you can possess your enemies and make them do your bidding.

So it's also a bit like Messiah

These elements are either a stroke of genius on the part of the game developers, or part of a macabre sense of humour where they think of a million ways for you to die or make others die.

Speaking of macabre, the scenery is a bit...nightmarish. The over-exaggerated industrial complex of the first level for example is gruesome. It can also kill you.

Yes, those are falling meat carcasses

Don't worry, eventually you get to visit exotic places, including forests and desert temples. And face the dangers they present. Like Scrabs. Oh, god, anything but Scrabs. I feel my heart skip a bit everytime I have to run from them.

At least the sequel can't get any more macabre.

Oh, wait

Thoughts on Doctor Who: The Impossible astronaut" (SPOILERS AHEAD)

2011-04-24T10:41:00.000-07:00

What to say about this year's start to Doctor Who? Well, it's creepy. It's also formulaic in its opening, reminding us of several past episodes so far. This seems to be a style Steven Moffat likes to go for. However he also seems to take cues from classic Who. I'll explain as I go...

The premise of this episode concerns the Silent, an alien race with hostile intentions who manage to be scary in a way the Daleks aren't. Daleks are - for me - not scary at all. They are intimidating by virtue of their ruthlessness and utter disregard for life. The Silent seem to present a more realistic fear.

A fear of the unknown that makes us think of the last 60 years of stories concerning UFO sightings and alien encounters.

The fact that we only catch them in glimpses, just as the protagonists only catch sight of them briefly in the corner of their eye, makes this episode work incredibly well. No one can remember what they look like, a form of amnesia induced by the aliens themselves, and this is something that gives as even more reason to be afraid.

We only catch them in glimpses and we can't remember them, yet they've been with us for a long time. Only the Weeping Angels can match that scare factor.

Mark Sheppard lends his gravelly voice to yet another popular sci fi series

What did I mean by formulaic opening? This episode opens up in a way that is all too familiar, not from the Doctor's perspective but from other peoples. Remember "Vampires of Venice" or "The Time of Angels" and you'll understand. This isn't a problem, just as long as it's done sparingly. Not that previous writers/directors in the span of 50 years of the show have never done this.

Overall, a fine start.

Medicines adverts, oh dear...

2011-04-23T07:58:00.000-07:00

Nuromol, Nuromol. Oh the claims you make.

I was at work the other day and a colleague was trying to explain the advantages of Nuromol to me. Oh, wait, better remember to insert the trademark. Nuromol™. There, that's better. Anyhow, the conversation was eerily familiar to the one I had with a sales representative in London earlier this year. Wait, it was exactly the same.

A load of praise for "Synchro-tech™ technology." Oh, good, almost forgot the trademark again. What is this "Synchro-tech™?" I have no idea, but it sounds like a jolly good thing. Shame the explanation only lasted 5 minutes, the sales guy could have used some pharmacology. You know, the stuff pharmacists are interested in.

However, he did show me a fancy graph:

You know it must be good when it's in colour...and has no numbers...or evidence

Does it really work better? Who knows. Maybe. Then again, there's nothing in medicines law preventing someone making a medicine that isn't superior to what's on the market. As long as it's safe, it can potentially get approval. I could potentially start making tablets in my garage and get approval, as long as my product is safe.

Although the advert is sort of illegal. Oh, wait. It is illegal.

The Domino effect makes me sick - literally

2011-04-06T11:39:00.000-07:00

Do you know what sucks about the Domino effect? No one attributes an event to it until something has happened. Usually something unfortunate. To me, for example:

First of all, I get a phone call from a friend and we meet for lunch. We discuss the usual: sci fi, comics and the fact that Colonel Gadafi looks hilarious.

We agree to go to a screening of Space Balls on the following week. Hooray, what could possibly go wrong?

Come monday and he says he can't make it. No problem, I've still got another body on the way. Yeah right. Being the awkward person I am, I get uncomfortable unless there's at least 3 of us so I cancel.

Dinner for one, what to have? There's a haggis, of all things, in the fridge. Hooray, what could possibly go wrong?

12pm, and I'm in bed feeling worse for wear. Fever, swollen throat, lousy headache. Food poisoning?

Tuesday, 11am and I'm still in bed feeling ill. The most productive thing I can do is watch silly videos on Youtube.

So many things I regret doing. Oh, why do bad things happen to good people?

New games = invest in new computer

2011-03-27T02:52:00.000-07:00

Dilemma dilemma. With the stream of new games available or soon to be released, I wonder if my barely 2 year old laptop can handle it. Maybe, but could it be time I got my hands dirty and learned how to build my own PC?

For the moment, let me just drool a little over some of the games I want to get my hands on. If I ever have the free time.

Space Marine: because swords aren't cool enough unless they're CHAINSWORDS.

Fallout New Vegas: hope it's not just another Fallout 3

Shogun 2 Total war: woohoo, I've always wanted little flags on my soldiers.

Dragon Age II: making the first one look tame by comparison

Civilisation 5: damn you Sid Meier! Must I waste more of my precious life on your games?

Random Thoughts: why do kids always need to go Player 1?

2011-03-06T08:32:00.000-08:00

As I watched my brother slaughter his way through CoD on a fine afternoon, I realised how far removed I've become from my joypad days. It's the keyboard for me now.

After all, the keyboard makes no distinction between Player 1 and 2.

Back in the days of yore, almost everyone I played HAD to go Player 1, or go into a fit (although that one kid across the road really was epileptic). There is almost no rational reason for this. In most games, your abilities were the same regardless of player 1 or 2. Happy evenings playing Metal Slug with my cousin were marred by this.

In hindsight, maybe he was afraid having ginger hair would make him a better target

The only possible explanation? Pride. Being player 1 sounds better in the demented mind of an adolescent.

Uggh, what a way to spend friday night.

2011-03-04T08:37:00.000-08:00

Breakdown of Friday night:

7:00pm: watched a friend play Demon's souls on PS3. He gets frustrated and decides to play "throw the controller across the room" instead.

8:30pm: we decide that my place might be a good change of scenery. Yeah right. All the computers in his house are being used and we need internet. He tells me to head out first and jumps in the shower. I'm getting a sense of deja vu.

9:00pm: I throw a lasagne in the oven and wait patiently, doing some pharmacy related stuff to pass the time.

10:00pm: the lasagne is polished off and I get a message apologising and saying he fell asleep (hopefully after and not during the shower). That explains the deja vu.

Oh well, an evening well spent.

The most I've ever paid for a book

2011-02-26T11:23:00.000-08:00

Really, I need to get a life. I'm paying £130 just so I can have access to a pharmacy reference book in the comfort of my own home.

I give you Stockley's drug interactions. 1700 pages that prove I'm getting too into my work and letting my social life atrophy.

At least I have a sensible reason justifying my purchase. Unlike the other stuff I buy.

Warehouse 13: awesome artifacty goodness

2011-02-12T07:04:00.000-08:00

There should be no need to stay up until 1am watching a DVD, it's not going anywhere. There should be no need to do it twice in a row. Warehouse 13 is such fun to watch, I'm nearing the end of season 1 and can't wait to make a start on the next. Some thoughts on the last 10 episodes.

For all everyday supernatural needs under one roof. Discounts on bank holidays.

I could just say "awesome artifacty goodness" and wrap it up, but let's not. The premise of the show easily allows for an episodic style that could be a bad thing and end up turning stale quickly but here it manages not to, as each episode presents a new artifact allowing for varied storylines.

As long as it doesn't go on all the time. Thankfully it doesn't, there's a good helping of story arc and enough character development at a fast enough pace to keep us interested. A show with two characters working side by side? I've seen this start and last 8 episodes before cancellation.

However so far it's going strong, possibly because Myka and Pete are simply so likeable. As are Artie and Claudia. A big thumbs up to the casting.

Is that my Bob Marley CD, young lady?

Here's a final shot to wrap up. If you want to know why there's a ferret climbing out of a kettle, there's one way to find out.

Random Thoughts: I watched Bicentennial Man with dread

2011-02-08T06:55:00.000-08:00

Did anyone else feel uneasy while watching Bicentennial Man? I don't mean thoughts on the movie, whether it was any good, but simply the thought of having a robot around the house. Near children.

Cool as it may seem at first, this can turn out so badly.

While the interactions between the robot and his "family" are supposed to be heart warming and charming, I couldn't help but dread the moment when the robot accidentally kills someone, oblivious to his own robot strength and limited awareness of how fragile humans can be.

It never came, but a part of the squidgey thing in my head I call a brain kept nagging at me, keeping me at the edge of my seat and wondering when something will go wrong.

I need to stop thinking so much.

Random Thoughts: the Joy of trolling

2011-02-06T11:10:00.000-08:00

Trolling can be really fun. Hell, it should be considered a past time for a rainy day. Give it a shot, you might like it. Make sure you do it on a Twilight forum, that really gets on people's nerves. I myself have submitted my own story ideas:

It seems in your anger, you killed her: as Edward rises from the ashes as a reconstructed cyborg, he asks "Where is Bella? Is she safe? Is she alright?" in a deep monotone voice, which would arguably make for a far more likeable character. As he is told the horrifying truth, he shouts mournfully "NOOOOOOOO!"

And the rest: I think these were the ones that got me perma-banned. Maybe my detailed descriptions of violent sex, depictions of Bella's head being separated from her spine, or my strong opinion that the Twilight books are metaphors for abusive relationships or bestiality just didn't sit too well with some people.

Now if you excuse me, I'm busy fending off a lawsuit from George Lucas. While you're visiting the forums, do me a favour and ask why I got banned. Oh, and don't forget this:

"SPOILER ALERT"

Epic fails can be hilarious fails

2011-02-06T11:00:00.000-08:00

What's worse: falling to your death, or getting plastered with fat zombie diarrhea?

This screenshot of a game of L4D 2 on the verge of ending hilariously (taken by my cousin while hijacking my Steam account) reminds me just how long it's been since I've splattered zombie brains against a wall.

I love L4D and its sequel. Even if a game does go disastrously wrong, I (like many players) laugh and shrug it off. If it ends with me dying at the finale, I consider it a gripping story of danger and sacrifice as I frantically fend off the horde with my dying breath while the others escape.

Or, I curse the traitorous swine who leave me bleeding to death on the motorway as they run away.

Awkward Turtle looks on as the League of Evil corner the last Teletubby

2011-02-04T16:17:00.000-08:00

Procrastination is such a terrible thing.

Random Thoughts: unanswered questions in Beauty and the Beast

2011-01-28T16:27:00.000-08:00

My parents always told me to look left and right before I cross, to wash my hands after going to the little boys room, not to be a fussy eater, and NEVER trespass into a creepy castle.

As I sat down to watch Disney's Beauty and the Beast (as 23 year old men often do and no, I don't think it's embarrassing that I like that movie, it happens to have a wonderful theme song...), I thought to myself: how many skeletons are in the dungeon? You know, the damp pneumonia breeding ground of a dungeon which the Beast locks Belle's father away in:

Hope you packed your Sudafed, old man

Probably more than a few.

Also, remember all those servants in the castle who were cursed to wander around as candlesticks/clocks/tables/teacups? In other words, lots of breakable objects who are also servants, in the presence of a very angry man beast. Added to that, 18th century France was not well known for humane treatment of servants.

So we have old men doomed to rot in dungeons and (assuming animated furniture can't truly die) then a fate worse than death for poor Cogsworth and Lumiere.

Yes, these random thoughts of mine just proves I've got some kind of personality disorder.

"Good hunting"

2011-01-25T10:41:00.000-08:00

5 months later and I wondered whether I was actually going to get anything for my £70, but it finally arrived! My Battlestar Galactica insignia pins sit in their black leather cases, looking very cool indeed. Now in keeping with my unashamed nerdiness (and questionable sanity, hey I did blow £70), I'm off to re-enact my favorite scenes

"WE TRADE CARS FOR CASH NOW!"

2011-01-18T14:38:00.000-08:00

So I was traveling in a taxi through Dumbarton and my eyes were drawn to a sign outside a car dealer lot. It read "WE TRADE CARS FOR CASH NOW!"

It took that grey matter of mine a minute to process this. Wow, an exclamation mark. I only put those at the end of my sentences when I'm genuinely surprised/shocked/horrified. The car dealers are really going to town.

Next, notice the actual meaning of the sentence. I may be thinking into this too much (damn you, brain!) but it seems to me Dumbarton has recently made the successful transition into a monetary system, one step up from the age old custom of bartering for goods.

Well done. Now you just need to sort out your endemic delinquency problem. The next logical step would be capital punishment.

Picture almost every pharmacy closing, and you have nowhere to go for your medicines.

2010-12-09T11:48:00.000-08:00

Remote supervision. Awesome, I sit comfortably somewhere running a dozen pharmacies by webcam or even by robot. That sounds great doesn't it? Except it won't since I'll be unemployed.

I really like getting paid to be a pharmacist since I get to buy stuff that's pretty important, like food. And without my usual salary I can't afford nice things, like the laptop I'm using to type this rant of mine.

Here's something I read from a paper out of the Nottingham school of pharmacy on the subject, "Although many customers had reservations about the system of remote supervision, the overwhelming majority positively welcomed it because they believed it would enhance access to medicines services."

I totally agree with this statement, if by enhance we mean an upsurge in dispensing errors. I can picture it now.

"Oh no, I just swallowed something I wasn't supposed to and I'm going into arrythmia. Curse that face on the monitor. Tell my mother I love her. Wait, what do you mean she just died from an overdo-"

I googled my pictures. It was either Homer or an old Indian dude clutching his chest

Seriously, even on a good day a pharmacy has its share of troubles. What will happen when there's not even a flesh and blood pharmacist present? It's not just starving and living under a bridge that's got me worried, it's the thought of thousands of people who'll probably die because of remote supervision.

Not everyone's as resilient as Homer Simpson, who's survived everything thrown at him. Why am I even talking about the Simpsons? I should have used another picture. Maybe because it's funny, just like how remote supervision is a good joke. If by good joke virtually every pharmacist in the UK decides to take a cue from their Irish counterparts. Picture almost every pharmacy closing, and you have nowhere to go for your medicines.

Proably the most interesting character in the Walking Dead

2010-11-30T11:13:00.000-08:00

Morgan Jones is one the most interesting characters on the Walking Dead. Well, he is to me. There's an irony to this.

Those familiar with the long running comic series will remember him as the black guy who shows up in the first issue and doesn't re-appear until much later. In fact, truth be told, when he did finally turn up again - bedraggled and somewhat deranged - I had forgotten who this guy was. He had made that little impact on me.

The TV version of Morgan is very different. Someone watching the pilot and enjoying it without being aware of the long running comic book series will note he has a major part in the pilot. Morgan is well fleshed out, with a brief back story that makes us sympathetic to him. This is supported by an incredibly moving scene where he breaks down into tears, unable to take aim at his wife now roaming the street as one of the undead.

Definitely one of the most interesting of the cast. I hope he returns.

The Walking Dead

2010-11-15T15:45:00.000-08:00

The pilot of the Walking Dead does a lot of things right, setting the grim tone for the rest of the series. However it wasn't flawless and something about it felt lacking. However the next two episodes have really blown me away, so much so that I'm waiting eagerly for the next installment of zombie goodness.

Actually, that kind of parallels my experience with the comics. However, by the time I got to volume 4 I really couldn't stop. Of course, the 12 volumes worth of comics is as far as I'll go with this madness. Nah, who am I kidding? I've already bought that awesome poster.

One of the strengths of the TV series is that it deviates and doesn't stick to the original source material without a fault. That'd be easy to do and would diminish the adaptation, making it little more than mimicry. And a straight adaptation from a book or comic is never a good thing, simply because the change in medium demands changes in pacing, dialogue etc. While fans may find some of the differences in character and plot questionable, by and large this makes it more enjoyable to watch.

Things I like and hate about my pre reg

2010-09-25T16:43:00.001-07:00

Hmmm, with work 5 days a week eating into my time, I've not even been able to rant much. In fact, on some days I wish I was back at university, when life seemed simpler.
With the pharmacy being as busy as it is, I feel swept off my feet sometimes. Still, I'm up for the challenge and I'm enjoying my pre reg, the culmination of 4 years of study. Some of the things I like are:

Friendly colleagues: a man can really end up hating his job if the people around him are miserable and grumpy. So it's fortunate for me that they actually crack a smile and make the effort to strike up a conversation.
A well organised pharmacy: there are some horror story pharmacies (and pharmacists) out there. This is not one of them.
Lots of opportunity for learning and practice: with the pharmacy located in the city centre, people walk in with all sorts of queries.

However, as usual I like to rant in my own adorable sardonic manner, so onto the stuff I hate:

Team managers: the owners of Boots, bless their evil hearts, like to have "line managers" for different departments in their stores. Presumably enough for all 18 levels of Hell
The store manager is a prick: apparently staff aren't allowed to wear those regulation body warmers, because the store manager says no. Seems like I missed the memo that said God was in charge.
Enough with the customer care: just to clarify, this is an approval rating based on surveys filled in by people. Like the flu, every so often we're reminded to pursue customer care. No, I really don't think I will.

The last one really ticks me off. A applying numbers to something that can't really be measured makes no sense. Worrying that your percentage has gone down by 1% this week is no different to Scrooge McDuck worrying that his money bin is missing a few hundred coins.

Meet GLaDOS, psychotic A.I. at your service

2010-09-20T16:29:00.000-07:00

My, how much fun can Portal be? Only mere hours of playing and I'm already feeling somewhat addicted to this clever game. A rather late introduction to an ingenious game, but better late than never.

The cake is, of course, a lie

Is it me or does Portal resemble the movie "Cube" and its sequels? Both involve being trapped in a series of rooms with puzzles/traps that becoming increasingly murderous. The only thing missing is the voice of GLaDOS. Oh, GLaDOS, how your voice will resonate in my dreams for years to come. Taking pride of place alongside the Weeping Angels from Doctor Who, the mutants from S.T.A.L.K.E.R. and those damn scary ventriloquist dummies.

Classic Doctor Who

2010-07-25T09:31:00.000-07:00

I've finally got round to sampling the old Doctor Who episodes, starting with The Ark in Space. Okay, let's get some things straight first. Most of my experience with Doctor Who is watching the new series i.e. Christopher Eccleston, David Tenant, Matt Smith. Yet what really strikes me is how similar classic Who is to the new Who.

The Ark in Space for example has all the hallmarks of an exciting story, with ideas and motifs that occur again in the Who of the new millennium.

In this episode, the Doctor and his companion search frantically for the keys to the TARDIS

Sure, the special effects, props and costuming can look awful in these older episodes but if you look past that for a moment and focus on the story then it's a lot of fun to watch.

Being a time travel show spanning a history of over 40 years, Doctor Who has always had a problem working to a consistent universe of sorts. However the quality of the story writing has endured. Watching old Who and comparing it with new Who, I can identify the mix of cerebral and action that makes Doctor Who so engaging and see why even today it's just as popular.

Jeffreys tubes are far more tortuous to navigate in the world of Doctor Who

I've chosen to watch the Tom Baker era, simply because it seems to be the most popular and well liked. If the Ark in Space is anything to go by, Baker's witty charm should be a laugh and a joy. He's also a bit of a maniac, so that's good too.

Russian roulette is not the same without a gun...

Ugggh, I've got summoning sickness.

2010-07-23T06:23:00.000-07:00

Or jetlag for the rest of you.

Maybe the typhoons will stop me starting pre reg

2010-07-22T01:19:00.000-07:00

Should I be flying away from Hong Kong in this weather? It's typhoon season, which admittedly sounds less exciting than an erupting icelandic volcano. Maybe if I spell it as "TYPHOON SEASON!" it'll have more impact. The thunder and lightning outside is very comforting. If it gets worse, maybe I won't have to start pre reg so soon...

No, you can't bring cans of flammable stuff onboard

2010-07-19T01:23:00.000-07:00

It took a bit of finding to get there, but UMl models in Mong Kok is arguably the largest model store I've stepped foot in. I snatched up a nice airbrush, my first in fact. Most of my modelling experience has been with small scale kits and wargames miniatures, so this'll be great for that Mark II Viper I've had my eyes on for a while.

Oh, wait.

In my excitement, I forgot airbrush propellants are flammable and explode nicely, a major no no for flying. So I'll be limited to just taking the airbrush and parts.

Shopping in Hong Kong: changes in the last 15 years

2010-07-15T05:32:00.000-07:00

Well the British pound doesn't go as far as it used to, eating into how much you can possibly buy abroad. Still, Hong Kong remains an excellent place to shop for just about anything you can think of. The sights and sounds of the metropolis certainly make it worth visiting.

Trying not to be too daunted by the meager exchange rate, I've snatched up some goodies so far: a Samsung 320 GB portable hard drive, a cooling pad for my ever hot laptop and 2 nice suits. For a guy with a small build, suits bought from Hong Kong - made for the Asian man in mind - are the perfect thing. What I'm trying to say is that Caucasian dudes can be a bit portly. Unless you're Barney Stinson. The suit place set me back a whopping £5000, about £500. The salesperson was clever and before long I had also bought 3 shirts and a belt. Hey don't judge me, they were nice shirts...

Salespeople have certainly changed a lot over the years in the region. 15 years ago there was no such thing as a receipt and if one was offered the store would deny it if you actually had the audacity to come back, giving you the look of a person who's just been told the world is going to end in a fiery apocalypse. Some were downright rude. I remember being in a toyshop many years ago and after looking around for 5 minutes was angrily threatened for not buying anything. Nowadays it's completely different. People can't wait to offer you this and that as if their life depended on it. Actually it kind of does since being unemployed is terrifying in a land with almost no social welfare. If you understand Cantonese, be warned. It will get on your nerves.

Malaria fear

2010-07-13T08:37:00.000-07:00

It only dawned on me recently - while I was on the toilet seat - that I've been visiting a near tropical area repeatedly over the 23 years of my life and might have been exposed to a malaria risk. Dwelling a little too much on my own mortality when I have too much time to myself, I had to make a frantic search on the WHO website to allay my fears.

The sweet hum of a jet engine in my ears for 11 hours

2010-07-07T03:35:00.000-07:00

Complaining about long distance flights seem like a lot of nagging and a small price to pay for a holiday, but if suspended animation became available, well I wouldn't mind being a pioneer.

This would be great. Leave out the facehuggers please.

Sleeping proved to be immensely difficult. After all, I'm used to not sleeping upright or having the sweet hum of a jet engine in my ears for 11 hours (a great lullaby for aeroplane enthusiasts perhaps). Oh, and I left my therapeutic pillow at home. So, no sleep for me.

What to do?

Plug in the soothing and reassuring academic voice of David Attenborough talking about sumatran flowers, platypus and sloths. Did it help? Er, not really, but I did learn a lot about sloths.

Diary of a ST.A.L.K.E.R.: well, maybe not

2010-07-02T07:22:00.000-07:00

Oh dear, my game's got all buggy so there'll be no more S.T.A.L.K.E.R. for a while. As I said in an earlier post, my biggest grip is the bugginess. If I ever get back to it, maybe I'll download the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Complete 2009 mod for some improved gameplay.

Random Thoughts: Rough Science is really rough

2010-06-29T01:00:00.000-07:00

Last night I stumbled on Rough Science. It's a TV programme with the following premise:

"The series' formula consists of a group of four or five scientists with specialities in different fields who are given a task that they must complete using the natural resources of the surrounding area together with a small set of supplies.

Sounds exciting, but I watched this with a constant sense of doubt and scrutiny. Maybe I'm just a fussy and pessimistic asshole but the presenter, Kate Humble, seems to put a little too much faith in contraptions like a scuba diving rebreather literally cobbled together with whatever's at hand. They weren't skimping on honesty when they came up with the title. She's the one who usually has to use these, so they let's hope they do a good job.

Now the premise is intriguing, the series has a noble environmentalist theme to it and I'm sure the cast are genuinely into it. Yet, Kate Humble seems out of place among a group of scientists, trying to look busy but ultimately contributing nothing. She exclaims with bewilderment how amazing it is you can melt solid metal over a fire. Really? Seriously? Now, I've seen worse on TV and to her credit, she is a well traveled presenter.

Still, it's probably miles better than Whale Wars and miles more honest with the title.

A degree from the university of airheads or something

2010-06-26T12:00:00.000-07:00

My pre reg was moved a few weeks ago to Glasgow, so no more having to look around for an apartment in Dumfries and Galloway.

The only possible downside? I'm working in a big store in the city centre, and everyone knows big stores run by corporate multiples are overseen by a nosy manager who rubs his nose in everything like an anteater at a buffet, they rake in the money not only from prescriptions but also through pesky desks devoted to cosmetics and stuff.

It makes my had spin to see shelves upon shelves of perfumes and make up, manned by sales people donning - of all things - white coats, strutting around like they have a degree from the university of airheads.

Where do they even get the white coats? Are they now some trendy garment sold on the high street for £50 each or do they masquerade as students and head to the Chemistry department at Strathclyde and snatch up a few? (admittedly the wiser and less costly option)

Movie Review: Prince of Persia (SPOILERS AHEAD)

2010-06-24T16:48:00.000-07:00

Most movies inspired by computer games suck. There, right to the point. Street Figher, Mortal Kombat, Resident Evil. These are some examples. Having said that, I watched Prince of Persia recently and for all its flaws it manages to be fun to watch. The comic relief is a bit cheap but tolerable (not a black guy stereotype for once). The visual style of the games, a sun baked landscape of sprawling Persian cities and vast deserts, is closely mimicked. It almost looks as though you're watching the game itself and in a good way.

I also enjoyed the closely replicated action familiar to the games. These are the strengths of the movie. Close mimicry works in a way that wouldn't for other adaptations. Maybe Prince of Persia, with it's acrobatic goodness and straightforward story, just works well. Then again it always helps when your inspiration isn't some psychotic story about plumbers feasting on mushrooms or incredibly fast hedgehogs with attitude. It isn't pretentious and avoids the temptation to insert a complex plot where there isn't one to begin with. It just works with the available material, which with it's simplicity happens to lend itself well.

Beware banana skins in the Persian desert

Yet, the lead looks vaguely like a Californian surfer guy minus the blond hair who's wandered onto the set of this movie. Shame that Ben Kingsley wasn't particularly great, I doubt I've ever seen a movie where the villain has so little screen time and dialogue (Sauron probably comes close). Then again, inserting a great actor isn't always a guarantee of success.

This might be as good as it gets for movies based on computer games. Hopefully future movies will prove me wrong. Damn, writing this has put me in the mood for playing the game.

Random Thoughts: let's make holiday flights less boring

2010-06-16T11:55:00.000-07:00

It's my first real holiday in 3 years so let's try to make the most of it, including the flight itself. The trouble is, long distance flights are essentially metal tubes of boredom attached to a set of engines. It's like a bomber with all the fun stripped from it, no paratroopers or high explosive payloads.

I could spice the flight up a bit. Nothing too disrupting that'll result in being tackled by air police and thrown into a brig. Something like:

1) Do a William Shatner: this works best at night time, which happens to be when we're flying. I just need to act as paranoid and terrified as possible, that'll get the hostess' attention as well as scare/annoy the hell out of everyone. Actually, come to think of it Shatner did get tackled at the end.

2) Do the brace position for no reason: if there's one way to describe most people, it's that they're lemmings. I can recall something about a guy who waited in a queue because other people were doing it. It turned out the queue was started by someone purely to test if people would act this way. Put yourself in the brace position and before long it'll catch on like the flu. 10 minutes into the panic, raise your head and ask if anyone has a paracetamol.

3) Read a book about the war on terrorism: it's all fine to read books on topics like the occupation of Iraq or the nature of Sadam Hussein's goverment, but it's amazing how touchy and apprehensive some people become at the sight of this, much like how some people assume the worst when a brown skinned dude comes on board. So before I depart I'll be sure to get myself such a book and position myself on an edge seat...so I can go to the bathroom easily.

4) Burp loudly: okay let's get this straight, burping is for when you've enjoyed a meal which is why I've never done it while flying. I remember the times I'm eating at a friend's house and have to remind myself that in white western families, it's often polite to say "excuse me" after letting out a satisfying bit of wind. Imagine the kind of chaos that ensues with a bunch of strangers in an enclosed cabin. Now I just need to train myself to control and regulate my own gas expulsion.

5) Play a made up game: think of something weird with convoluted rules, like Rock-paper-scissors-lizard-Spock Chess or Fizbin and play it through to while away the hours. As a bonus. if you're lucky some guy sitting nearby will be peering over his newspaper wondering just what the hell this game is.

6) Act like an annoying Texan: this works best if you're white and have the right body shape, like the Rich Texan from the Simpsons. Whip off some irritating "Texan" metaphors in that accent while wearing a big hat. On an 11 hour flight, people will want to strangle you. Too bad it's not a bomber, otherwise you can ride a bomb like a rodeo cowboy.

7) Discuss mortality: have a lively(?) philosophical debate with your chum about death and the afterlife. Bound to unnerve a few folk.

Diary of a S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: never go out at night

2010-06-09T09:25:00.000-07:00

Slightly on the verge of wetting myself, I frantically empty another clip into an invisible enemy. It's night time and the rain is pouring as I make my way through an abandoned village. The Zone is already dangerous to wander around during the day. It becomes that bit more terrifying after dark, made even worse by Bloodsuckers lurking around. I hate Bloodsuckers. I really do.

Sweet dreams!

These mutants of the Zone can disappear at will and re appear to attack in front of you. Right in front of you. Is it me or is that just plain unfair? I do the sensible thing (which perhaps should have been to run) and whip out the shotgun for some point blank shootiness. By the time I'm done searching the village for loot, I've barely survived 3 of the things.

Diary of a S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: fun in the sewers

2010-06-07T09:28:00.000-07:00

Exploring a sewer is not fun when you're in the Zone. I blame the dark corridors, bandits and soldiers for making my search for Strelok's stash so much harder. Why there are Russian soldiers down here eludes me.

Let's not forget the darkness.

Oh, that ever present lack of light. Good thing I have my trusted flashlight. Or not, since the creepy shadows it casts only makes the experience of meeting mutants slightly less terrifying. The ones I've come across are the bloodsucking or gas mask wearing type (I have yet to meet wisecracking turtles).

When I finally get out of there, it's dark outside. Time to hit the bar.

Say hello to the Master of Pharmacy!

2010-06-05T15:01:00.000-07:00

The title says it all. I just checked my exam results. Needless to say, I am in a happy place. So say hello to a Master of Pharmacy with merit!

Diary of a S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: 100 rads Bar is the place to be at night

2010-06-04T05:23:00.000-07:00

The Zone is not a fun place to be when the sun sets. Packs of wild dogs, mutants and the shortage of light makes it a very dangerous environment indeed.

Rostok is only marginally more fun, home to the most annoying characters I have ever seen in a computer game. I can't drink my vodka in peace without the Snitch in the corner repeating the same 2 lines of dialogue every 10 goram seconds. "Stalker, come here. I always got information for people like you." "My information could be of very well use to you stalker." Over and over again.

He NEVER shuts up

Sadly the 100 rads Bar is a no weapons area. Oddly enough, I can stash all of my belongings into one trunk in the bar, come back after a day long excursion in the Zone and wallah, everything is still there. Although that one guy keeps eyeballing my stash rather suspiciously.

Try it and I'll tear you a new one

This seemingly great degree of respect for one's property is tempered by the one instance of asshole behavior in this settlement. You'd be forgiven for thinking the guy on the floor was sleeping, until you talk to him and realise he was in desperate need of a first aid kit as his "comrades" sitting happily around the fire, either oblivious or uncaring.

Rostok - not the most interesting place to be, but it's certainly safer than out there.

S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl: first impressions

2010-05-29T10:09:00.000-07:00

It's my first foray into the Zone. General impression? Brutal and unforgiving.

Other points? The game is full of bugs and not really that well written (storyline wise). I'm sure some will disagree with me - all hate mail will be diligently deleted - the concept of a fictional Chernobyl is really intriguing but the NPCs really don't help move the story forward. I guess the trusted in game PDA is there to fill in the gaps as the game progresses, but the game feels somewhat unfinished.

When it comes to atmosphere I give it 10 of out 10. Plus the sense of desperation, that is starting out with very little to aid you in survival, and the constant need to scavenge for ammo and bandages means that even at this early stage S.TA.L.K.E.R. seems like an engaging experience.

I suck at dispensing

2010-05-22T15:40:00.000-07:00

I am dreading my exam results in 2 weeks time. More precisely I'm dreading the result for my dispensing exam, which I have a terrible feeling I've failed. What did I do wrong? I don't know but thinking back I'm quite certain I forgot to write the dose check out in full for a prescription. Which is an instant fail. I'd rather be told here and now if I passed or failed rather than sit through the agonising waiting. On the bright side (hopeless optimism is always good at this stage), all my exams are over.

Open book exam? This will be a walkover. Right?

2010-05-15T15:35:00.000-07:00

Actually, I take that back. I certainly did make extensive use of the trusty BNF (especially when it came to figuring out proprietary names), even at 3 hours it proved a challenge. Let's hope it went well.

Sweet dreams!

2010-05-10T04:23:00.000-07:00

My, my, either I've been reading too many murder novels or I'm developing psychopathic tendencies. At times my dreams can be as interesting as watching custard congeal and not worth the effort to even discuss, but last night it played out like a movie starring me as myself methodically murdering everyone in a movie.

Oh, and I don't read murder novels so it probably means I am turning into a psychopath. I blame television.

The details are fuzzy at best but I'm a guest at a manor house of a wealthy family and for some reason I end up bludgeoning the wife to death. Forget what I said about being methodical, I now recall it as being a haphazard and frantic effort to cover my tracks. The husband asks if I've seen his wife. I also bludgeon him to death. If there's one thing we all know, it's that you can always make things better by killing everyone.

It must have been the cheesecake. Definitely.

Why is your hand so warm and sweaty?

2010-05-06T14:09:00.000-07:00

Another 3 exams to plow through, with Clinical Pharmacology and Prescribing out of the way. Normally at the end of a long exam I head straight to the bathroom but this time I mostly just felt thirsty. A friend commented on how warm and sweaty my hand felt. Must have been all that writing. That, and I was scratching my bum. My, what a pointless rant, time to go and covet my unopened copy of Dragon Age: Origins and all the other games I won't be playing.

My hand is so falling off

2010-05-05T09:24:00.000-07:00

One exam down, another four to go. I'm certain of it, my hand will become a mass of ragged skin and bone by 5 o' clock tomorrow. It's Clinical Pharmacology and Prescribing, 3 hours of assessing a clinical journal and answering 10 questions about it.

That sounds easy but there's a reason for the exam being 3 hours long. Actually they could have given us more time or fewer questions. Even while practicing with previous papers, it's taking ages to write full answers.

Only someone with a futuristic cyborg hand or something could manage, it'll be like high school history all over again. Well at least my final one is all multiple choice questions...all 100 of them.

To my final year..and dark dank caves

2010-04-29T17:11:00.000-07:00

This is it, my final semester. I'd like to say it's the last time I'll ever have to sit exams but it's not. That comes in another year with my registration exam. Again, there never seems to be enough time in a single day, luckily the revision is almost done. As fascinating as it is, I'm refraining from studying some of the chapters in Advanced drug discovery in too much detail. Weighing at a mere 10 credits, it won't impact that much on my final grade. So it's holding onto our butts and buckling down to Pharmaceutical Care and the other classes, the real meat of the final year.

My shiny new copy of Dragon Age: Origins - a birthday present from my sister - is sitting in my wardrobe. Not one I thought about buying. Maybe I should bash my head against a wall and ask myself "Why not?" After all it's supposed to be amazing and the only way I couldn't notice all the hype and glowing reviews would be if I use my monthly issue of PC Gamer for something other than reading (wacking spiders, makeshift toilet paper etc) or if I was living in a dark dank cave. Apart from the risk of pneumonia or tuberculosis, it would make a wonderfully cool abode during a hot summer and a great place to study, contemplate the universe or be anti-social while avoiding the need for bathing and shaving for a while.

Curse you corporate Pharmacy!

2010-04-02T07:04:00.000-07:00

Lots of houses for rent in Castle Douglas, and by houses I mean houses, not flats. Then again for a small town of 3000 people in the south of Scotland, it's not a surprise the tallest building doesn't surpass 3 storeys. As far as I can tell they're also on the pricey side (and that's not including council tax). Now I just need to confirm all the details and that I'm actually going to do my pharmacist trainee work in Dumfries and Galloway. Easier said than done. 3 emails later and still not a single reply, unless we were to count the half hearted typings of some peon slouched in front of a computer in resourcing. Damn you, corporate trolls. "From hell's heart I stab at thee! For hates sake I spit my last breath at thee!"

7 things I learned from working on a dissertation

2010-03-31T06:18:00.000-07:00

£10 worth of printing and binding later and my dissertation (both copies, one for each marker) slides into the metal cabinet with a reassuring thump. I'm 2 days early and give myself a high five. This may be the first and only time I need to do something like this. What did I learn from writing 9000 words worth of research?

#1: I make lots of mistakes

About 6 days before the deadline I print off a draft and exhaust all my free credits at the Pharmacy department. So there goes my idea of printing funny posters of Martin and putting them all over campus (Gay? Young? Want a good time?). Anyhow, I spent half an hour scrutinising the draft for all the mistakes I made. And that was just correcting my references. So the moral of the story, leave yourself some time to put in all the missing commas (all 30 of them).

#2: Higher English and History came in handy

Finding it hard to make your dissertation sound eloquent? Lucky for me, I wrote a lot of essays back in high school. So for all my inadequacies, I can punch out some pretty darn good sounding pieces. Thank you, history teacher/Tom Baker lookalike.

#3: Your supervisor wrote the book on your topic

This won't apply to everyone writing a dissertation. However in my case, the Professor's been around for some time so knows almost everything there is to know about prostanoids. He also taught at the Chinese University of Hong Kong, so that's cool as well.

#4: Try not to chat so much in the lab

If it takes all day to get a decent set of results, it won't hurt to cut down on the chat. Even if it is ridiculously funny that one of your classmates thought "Tsunami" is the name of a country.

#5: Bring a pack lunch

If it does take all day to get your results and you have little time to spare, packing sandwiches will be helpful.

#6: Read lots of journals and take notes while you do it

To write a 9000 word dissertation, I did some leg work and typed 9000 words worth of notes from all the journals I read. It helps when those notes are in your own words too.

#7: Recycle or burn all those journals

You'll probably have a lot of papers left over by the end. Do what you want with them. One person I know plans to burn the dissertation when she gets it back. I hope she remembers to remove the plastic folder.

Random Thoughts: scraping the bucket dry with toy ideas

2010-03-28T06:21:00.000-07:00

I was enjoying my apple juice the other day and I almost choked when I saw the advert for this. The "Little Tikes Makin’ Mud Pies Play Set". This really scrapes the bucket dry. Some guy in marketing must be high fiving himself on a job well done when he came up with a way to commercialise playing with mud:

This is way to pristine for a mud pie play set. A bit more filthy looking and it'll be perfect

Wow, really imaginative ideas you have there Fisher-Price. What's next, an earthworm eating play set?

Reason #15 for getting fired: calling someone's daughter "unclean"

2010-03-08T12:26:00.000-08:00

So we had a lecture from a public health pharmacist today and we were asked what would be the polite and sympathetic way to deal with children with headlice in the pharmacy. My thoughts gravitated toward shouting "unclean!" and "get away from me, deceased child!" Which would very quickly earn a dismissal if I was to actually utter those kind of words. Note to self: this is NOT the Black death.

Let me just slip into my white coat

Interesting fact: girls are more likely to get headlice because they like to play closer together and be more intimate with their friendships. Every guy in the room laughed uproariously.

Back up, back up and back up

2010-03-07T04:16:00.000-08:00

Strokes or heart attacks are still not quite happening yet, but everyone I know seems to be losing their hair over their essays being lost. Usually the day before a deadline. So before Lady Luck decides to play some tricks with me for laughs and chuckles, I'll invest in an extra USB stick.

Will work for biscuits

2010-03-06T13:28:00.000-08:00

I think I should start getting paid for doing things for people. Not actual money, just a crude barter system with biscuits (preferably Oreos) and other snacks given to me.

For example, the other day I was treated to lunch at a Chinese buffet, the most calories I ever devoured in a lunch during university hours. After reading and writing comments for one classmate's essay everyone seems to get the idea to send their work to me, like I'm some kind of teacher.

I'm not even that good at it, all my comments and suggested corrections drawn from pharmacy knowledge and what little common sense there is in my squidgey brain. Then again don't let that put anyone off approaching me, as long as you got the goods. I accept payment in biscuit and chocolate form.

Netbooks aren't just for work and study

2010-03-05T05:59:00.000-08:00

Hands up anyone who only use their computer for work and studying? Yep, didn't think so. They might not be the most high powered things around, certainly don't expect a netbook to be able to run games like Mass Effect, Fallout 3, Left 4 Dead or Stalker.

However with pre reg only months away in rural Dumfries and Galloway, I'm expecting long train journeys when I make visits home to the family. Which means I want to invest in something small and compact do some studying and, of course, a bit of gaming with.

It'll mean a chance to break out old classics like Caesar III, Planescape: Torment, Diablo (which incidentally don't work on my 64-bit OS) or odd indie titles like Plants versus Zombies. So that's another thing to shop for before July rolls around.

It's been a while since I've read a book. Well, there was the informative "A History of the Arab Peoples" which I've still to actually finish. I've always had a thing for history, but it's ages since I picked up a decent sci fi novel, my pet genre. I used to read meaty 400 page tomes, like the acclaimed "Dune" by Frank Herbert. Somebody hurry up and make a decent movie adaption of it. A thoroughly recommended read:

That luxury's out of my reach now so it's something more easily digestible now for me. However smaller books are by no means less enjoyable. For example I recently picked up a couple from my local Waterstones and have devoured my way through one of them:

Venice is great, just stay away from the water

2010-02-24T04:56:00.000-08:00

A white clad and totally not conspicuous hooded assassin impales yet another target on his blade. Meanwhile on another screen not far away - in other words less than 2 feet away - a lone wonderer flame grills an old man's head on a stove, while the guy's grand children sit in the other room, wondering what smells so good.

Assassin's Creed II: because even 15th century Italians need to sort out feuds

Yeah, just another casual gaming night at a a friend's house, while munching on snacks, staying up late and knowing full well that there's no early morning lecture or work to wake up to tomorrow. We're in the living room, Phil gripping his PS3 joypad and experiencing the sites and sounds of renaissance Venice in Assassin's Creed II, while I'm right next to him with my laptop experiencing the brutal and unforgiving Capital wasteland of Fallout 3.

We're chuckling away, not quite realising yet that not only are we enjoying the site of old man Harris' head on a stove a little too much, but that I'm choosing this R & R time to play my laptop at my friend's house when we could be doing something a bit more worthwhile and less pathetic on this fine evening.

Get it while it's hot kids!

It gets worse, I'm collecting garden gnomes now

However if there's anything I learned in that evening, it's that no one in 15th century Venice knows how to swim. Anyone - apart from the protagonist - who falls into one of the many waterways of the city is a dead man. Maybe medieval people are allergic to water, that's why no one bathes.

Watch out for the water!

At least the night life seems pretty good. That guy's just drunk. Honest

Chinese New Year open house. In other words, free food.

2010-02-20T03:51:00.000-08:00

Having spent numerous hours working on all these essays, it was nice to relax a little. In short, fun was had by all. Happy New Year!

Fuuny glitches in Fallout 3

2010-02-18T15:59:00.000-08:00

Every game has its glitches. Some of them can be pretty funny. For example, that one time I went to that post apocayptic theme park:

Come on kids, get your photo taken with aquaman!

Or those floating hammers, truly a miracle that can only have come from God:

Hammer of the Gods can also mean other things...

The attack on the Enclave HQ happened to fall on casual Friday:

Really casual Friday

These are just the funny ones. I was fortunate never to have come across the creepy glitches. Until I went on Youtube...

Who needs Valentine's Day? We've got St. Skeletor Day

2010-02-15T14:52:00.000-08:00

What a satisfying Chinese New Year dinner with the family. If there is a higher power then I'm sure that power is high-fiving himself at a job well done, for placing this Chinese New Year on the same day as Valentine's Day. That should test the loyalty of some scumbags out there - spend time with family or with your girlfriend?

It's a no brainer. With Chinese New Year you get a slap up meal with the family and money given to you (unless you're too old which judging from the red envelopes on my desk I'm not). If you lose your mind and go for the spending time with girlfriend option, then you better be happy sharing an overpriced meal together and losing even more money on flowers or chocolates.

Remember, for next year there's always St. Skeletor Day if you want an excuse to be selfish and keep the chocolates to yourself.

Sweep away the bad luck

2010-02-12T11:23:00.000-08:00

Hmmm, it's almost Chinese New Year and I still haven't got around to cleaning the house, so all that bad luck is still lingering around in the form of dust. I'll need to get the studying for this class test out of the way soon so I can start the clean up.

Bright yellow syrup

2010-02-11T09:36:00.000-08:00

Ha, of all the things a person can miss, it's the amoxicillin syrup I used to get as a child. It was arguably the brightest (almost fluorescent) yellow liquid I have ever laid eyes on and tasted incredibly sweet. That stuff made taking antibiotics fun for children. Who wants capsules when there's a perfectly good bottle of teeth decaying medicine available? A guaranteed sugar high.

Everyone's favourite tropical disease

2010-02-09T04:38:00.000-08:00

Well, a class next next Monday, right after the start of Chinese New Year. At least it never falls right in the middle of any exam diets (yeah, after 4 years that's all I think about, exam diets govern my life now). With the chapter on Tuberculosis therapy out of the way, there's just one more chapter to study for, everyone's favourite tropical disease - Malaria!

Engrossed in zombie fiction

2010-02-01T11:18:00.000-08:00

Actually, with the inventive way Max Brooks' "World War Z" is written, I'm convinced that a zombie apocalypse could be plausible. It's a journalist's lively oral account of survivor stories across the world, who recount their memories of the event that changes the world. It's comforting to read Brooks's words and know that in the event that zombies do rise up, invade our homes and start munching on mankind, anyone with some healthcare knowledge and experience will be useful in helping rebuild the world. So I'm glad I'm working to become a pharmacist and not a lawyer or accountant. Assuming I survive at all.

Good thing I never got the essay on hemorrhoids

2010-01-31T14:37:00.000-08:00

As I write my assignments on urinary tract infections and liver disease, I find myself becoming increasingly interested in the topics. Slowly but surely, the thought of another person's kidneys and urethra fascinates me in a way that goes beyond simple fascination. Now it's just becoming disgusting. Like the unfinished pack lunch that I forgot and left for too long in a warm room. Good thing I never got an essay on hemorrhoids.

Random Thoughts: ritual burials are awesome, I want one

2010-01-28T14:10:00.000-08:00

I was in the shower the other day and I thought, wouldn't it be great if we could still be buried with all the pomp and ceremony of ancient peoples? I for one would love to be treated with all the attention of a dead Egyptian pharaoh, Shang emperor, or Viking chieftain.

The 21st century man accumulates a lot of material goods in his lifetime, more than our ancestors' meager collections of worldly goods (I must admit a chariot would be great for racing around the neighborhood) and would have even more need of a ritual burial. Besides it's better to bury our wealth with us than leave it to an economy that's just taken a nose dive. Ok, my iPod may not survive the ravages of time (tell that to the directors of "The Book of Eli") but future archaeologists may excavate and find a fossilized lump that tells a great deal about life in our time.

Ethics dictates that it's unethical to bury people to accompany you in the afterlife. However there's bound to be a loophole somewhere. For example, let's say that I place a person into a medically induced coma. Technically it's not a live burial, just a long stay in my post mortem residence. However there's probably nothing like the sight of a Viking longboat set ablaze, with all my stuff onboard (which would be physically impossible since I'll have so much stuff).

Should sacrificial burials be too much in this day and age (what with human rights and everything), I would still appreciate a terracotta army to guard me in the afterlife. Except mine would be robots made to look like terracotta. Looters entering my mausoleum will be promptly decapitated.

Even the horses will be robotic

Actually, forgot that, if they can make such sophisticated robots then they can transfer my consciousness into an artificial body.

A cross between someone with tetanus and an extremely ticklish man

2010-01-19T13:00:00.000-08:00

There I was, tucked into bed and fast asleep when I was jerked suddenly into a sense of wakefulness, a bit like how someone puts ice cubes on your chest while you're snoring away in the land of nod.

Except instead of sudden and acute cold, it was sudden and acute pain to my calf. My muscles tensed up so violently, like a cross between someone with tetanus and an extremely ticklish man subjected to a feathering. It was one of those nights.

Everyone should experience it, it's fun in a sort of weird way and most importantly you'll share in my suffering.

I'm a young looking thing

2010-01-12T05:04:00.000-08:00

I had the best pork chops yesterday, with a mustard and cider sauce alongside some gnocci and spinach. Courtesy of my sister, who I'm staying with. Getting the ingredients was easy enough, although buying the cider turned out to be an issue. It's great to know I look under 21 since I was aked to show I.D. Note to self: a student card is not accepted at the supermarket.

Storming Evergreen Mills: dishing out some justice in Fallout 3

2010-01-07T15:27:00.000-08:00

Yes, we're not wearing the right helmets, but who cares, we look gorgeous in the latest wasteland fashion.

Having Charon (my ghoul follower) around does even out the scuffles I get into by a bit. I rarely die in this game (but watch out for yao guai, they'll maul you to death before you know what happened) but some backup is a good thing. He's proven himself well in a fight, and all it cost was a stain on my conscience. But hey, the fact I don't mind having a ghoul around shows I have some good in me, right?

To enact some justice in this wasteland, I took to storming Evergreen Mills, a stronghold of raider scum. Actually it was for a bit of fun and the prospect of loot.

All went well, then Charon had the strangest idea to open a holding pen and unleash a super mutant behemoth (ok, enough with the excuses, the AI is obviously not perfect). Things got a bit complicated from that point on, now that we were trying to fight raiders and a gigantic monster.

This is a super mutant behemoth

With every raider bleeding out of his skull, we helped ourselves to free loot and drinks at the bar.

A day in suburbia: another session of Fallout 3 mayhem

2010-01-06T13:17:00.000-08:00

As if nothing more weird could happen, I stumble across a virtual reality machine and entered a very American suburbia. In sepia. Just to point out, if I was plugged into an environment resembling the set of Desperate Housewives, life truly would be spectacularly hellish (plus I would vomit at the lollipopness of the whole thing).

For one thing there would be the most evil child in the universe making unusual requests of you. Like ruining someone's marriage or killing old Mrs Henderson in the most, em, creative way possible. I decided to tamper with her stove then ask her to bake me a pie.

Does this mean I don't get any pie?

Or something a bit more extreme, like asking you to kill the whole neighborhood.

It gets weirder, she's actually a dude with a German accent

Not the most karma friendly thing to do, but the most straightforward way to advance the plot so I picked up my clown mask and knife, and promptly went ahead.

How does that Psycho theme tune go? Dun-dun-dun-dun!

This took ages, since everyone has the tendency to run and hide, but one by one the people of Tranquility Lane met their fate. The irony of that name was not lost on me.

I think I'm safe

I need to re-think my hiding place

No, no you dumb blonde. Run AWAY from the killer.